Alright, so if you've read any of my past journals here, you'll know that I've been struggling with what I'm doing in college, what I want to study to be happy, whether I should stop with the Biology and go into Animation or Art. And last night, it hit me hard that I really need to stop fooling around.

I had an Organic Chemistry quiz in a discussion section and I failed. HARD. And the fact coupled with the fact that I don't particularly enjoy biological sciences or really have any affinity for much else got me thinking about what I'm doing in school in general. And so, I thought about it for a long time. Well, thought sounds so serious; I juggled with the idea of what I'm doing. And this morning, I decided on what I want to do and where I want to go.

I've decided how I'm going to play this whole college thing. I'm going to try Computer Science, because I honestly don't hate it as much as I do the Biology. If I don't like it, and miss Biology, I'll go back to that. If I don't miss it and don't like either, I'm going to go Art. For the first time in college, I had a direction that I wanted, not what I thought somebody else approved of or what they wanted of me. Had. Because now, when I'm feeling good about what I want to do, the classes needed to start Computer Science aren't being offered this quarter, except one.

Yeah. I'm raging pretty hard.

But anyway, I decided to be more active in art in general. Once I have the time (Midterms. AGAIN. I hate Biology so much.). So I joined 's Secret Santa. And if I have time, that Wacom contest. But, the Secret Santa comes first. So here goes...

Dear Secret Santa,

I would like one of the following:

- My OC, the blonde girl in a couple of my past deviations.



In terms of design, the final version is the one with the colors (Fun's Fun). Personality wise, she's energetic and fun-loving and prefers to do the things that make her happy, rather than what she has to do. If told to do something she deems boring, she'll immediately retort that it's a waste of time. Basically, if it's no fun, she won't do it. But no matter what she tries or does, she is always determined to get it right, and won't stop until she does.

Sorry if that's not much to go on, but I've only just come up with her recently and started fleshing out her character on and off in the last couple weeks or so.

- Toph from Avatar: The Last Airbender.

- This loser: (me) doing Usain Bolt's Pose.

Many Thanks, SANTA!